Destined hon-9 Read online

  “Or yourself,” Stevie Rae said solemnly. “I get it. I really do. I just don’t like it much.”

  “I don’t, either, but I think that’s the point Nyx was making. I’m paying the consequences for my past actions.” He cupped her sweet, soft cheek in his palm and pressed his lips to hers murmuring, “It is a price I willingly pay because the other side of it, the good side of it, gives me the hours we steal together when I am human.”

  “We don’t steal them!” Stevie Rae said earnestly. “Nyx gifted you with them for the good choices you’ve made. Consequences go both ways, Rephaim. They can be good and bad.”

  Somehow that made his heart feel lighter and he smiled, kissing her again. “I’ll remember that.”

  “I want you to remember somethin’ else, too. You did a good thing today when you didn’t turn your back on your brothers.” Her fingers plucked at a blond curl, and he knew whatever she was saying was hard for her, so even though he needed to get free of the tunnels, to get above to the waiting sky, he remained sitting there beside her with her hand in his while she continued. “I’m sorry your brother got killed.”

  “Thank you,” he said quietly, hardly trusting his voice.

  “They came to the House of Night to get you to leave with them, didn’t they?” she asked.

  “Not really. Father did send them to find me, but not to take me away.” Rephaim paused, not sure how to explain the rest to Stevie Rae. The two of them hadn’t talked about his brothers when they’d finally been alone—they’d been too eager to touch, to be close, to love.

  Stevie Rae squeezed his hand. “You can tell me. I trust you, Rephaim. Please trust me, too.”

  “I do!” he exclaimed, hating the hurt he saw in her eyes. “But you have to understand that even though Father has disowned me, that changes nothing here.” He touched his chest over his heart. “I will forever be his son. I’ll walk the path of the Goddess. I’ll fight for Light and what is right. I’ll love you. Always. But you must understand that somewhere inside me I’ll always love him, too. Becoming human has taught me that.”

  “Rephaim, I have to tell you somethin’ that might sound mean, but I think you need to hear it.”

  He nodded. “Go ahead. Tell me.”

  “Before I was Marked I went to school with this girl name Sallie. Her momma took off and left her and her daddy when she was about ten ’cause she was basically just a downright nasty ho slut and she didn’t want the responsibility of raisin’ a kid. It hurt Sallie real bad when her momma left, even though her daddy tried to do his best for her. But the worst part of the whole thing was that her momma wouldn’t stay gone. She’d come back and, as my momma used to say, stir the shit pot.”

  He gave her a questioning look, and Stevie Rae said, “Sorry, that means her momma came back around just to mess with her—to keep Sallie’s life all filled with stupid drama and such because she was selfish and mean and uber screwed up.”

  “What happened to this Sallie girl?” Rephaim asked.

  “When I got Marked and left school she was on her way to bein’ as uber screwed up as her momma ’cause she didn’t have the strength to tell her momma to stay away. Sallie still wanted her momma to be a good person, to love her and care about her, even though that just wasn’t possible.” Stevie Rae drew a deep breath and let it out in a long sigh. “What I’m tryin’ to say, and probably not doin’ it very well, is that you’re gonna have to decide whether you want to be as messed up as your daddy, or if you want to really start a new life.”

  “I’ve already chosen a new life,” he said.

  Stevie Rae met his eyes and shook her head sadly. “Not all of you has.”

  “I can’t betray him, Stevie Rae.”

  “I’m not askin’ you to. All I’m askin’ you to do is to not let him stir your shit pot.”

  “He wanted me to spy for him. That’s what he sent my brothers to tell me. I told Nisroc no.” Rephaim said the words quickly, as if by doing so he could get rid of their bitter taste.

  Stevie Rae nodded. “Yeah, see, shit pot stirring.”

  “I do see it, even though it isn’t an easy thing to look at. Can we not talk about him for a while? All this is new for me. I need to figure out how to find my place in this world.” Rephaim stared into Stevie Rae’s kind eyes, willing her to understand. “I’ve been with Father for hundreds of years. It’s going to take some time for me to get used to not being by his side.”

  “That makes sense. How ’bout this: I’ll tell Zoey and the rest of the gang that your brothers were there to let you know Kalona would take you back if you said you’d made a mistake. You said no, so they were just leavin’ when Dragon and that Aurox guy saw you. That’s the truth, right?”

  “Yes. What about the rest of it, the part about Father asking me to spy for him?”

  “Well, I can tell you that I’ll bet everyone pretty much figures Kalona would try to use you against us if you let him. You’re not letting him, so I don’t think spelling it out for them is a big deal.”

  “Thank you, Stevie Rae.”

  She smiled. “No problem. Like I said, I trust you.”

  He kissed her again, but about then he began to feel an already all-too-familiar prickling over his skin, as if his feathers were forming, growing, pressing to be free. “I must go.” And this time he began to move quickly from the room. He could hear her start to get off the bed behind him and when he looked back she was pulling on her T-shirt and looking around for her jeans. “No,” he said more firmly than he’d intended, but the pain had already begun through his body and he knew he hadn’t much time. “Don’t come with me. You have to meet with Zoey.”

  “But I can after—”

  “I don’t want you to see me become a beast!”

  “I don’t care about that,” she said, looking like she was on the verge of tears.

  “But I do. Please. Do not follow me.” Without another word he ducked under the blanket that served as a door covering to Stevie Rae’s room. By the time he’d reached the metal ladder-like stairs that led up from the tunnels and into the basement, Rephaim was running. Sweat poured from his body and he had to grit his teeth not to cry out with the burning agony of the change that was gripping him. He sprinted through the basement and flung open the grate just as the sun slipped free of the horizon and with a scream that turned into the cry of a raven his body shifted form and the dark raven who had no memory of the boy launched himself into the seductive, waiting arms of the morning sky.

  Stevie Rae

  Stevie Rae didn’t go after him, but she did finish getting dressed. She wiped her eyes, too, before she left her room and turned in the opposite direction Rephaim had taken and headed for the hub of the depot tunnels—the little cul-de-sac-like area they’d turned into a kitchen and computer hub. Mountain Dew, she thought as she stifled a yawn. I need me some caffeine and sugar.

  She rounded the corner and smiled sleepily at Damien, Zoey, Aphrodite, and Darius. The four of them were sitting around a table loaded with books in the center of the kitchen.

  “There’s lots of pop in that fridge,” Zoey said, waving at one of the two big side-by-side refrigerators.

  “More than just brown?”

  “There’s brown and green and clear. Oh, and some Orange Crush because Kramisha said she thinks it’s healthy,” Z said.

  “Which is bullshit,” Aphrodite said before upending a bottle of Fuji water. “Choose water. Anything else will make you fat. Well, except for blood.” She paused and her beautiful face squeezed into an ick look. “I don’t know about the calorie count in it, and since I un-fledgling-ed I don’t even want to think about it.”

  Stevie Rae pulled open the fridge and gawked at the loaded insides. “Where did all this stuff come from?”

  Zoey gave a little sigh. “Kramisha. She said instead of going to third hour she ‘field-tripped’”—Z air quoted—“to Utica Square and just happened to run into some night shift guys stocking the shelves at Petty’s grocery s
tore.”

  Stevie Rae peeked around the arm of the fridge at Z. “Uh-oh. She red vamp zapped them?”

  “She definitely zapped them,” Damien said. “Which is how all this food got delivered down here. She even talked them into bringing this table from one of their food sample setups.”

  “She didn’t eat them, did she?” Stevie Rae asked, crossing her fingers behind her back.

  “No, but she didn’t pay them, either,” Aphrodite said. “She just made them do her bidding and then leave and forget all of it. I think I’m taking her with me to New York City next time Yoana Baraschi has a trunk show.”

  “No,” Zoey said. “Just no.” Then she looked at Stevie Rae. “Are you really awake? Stark and all the red fledglings, including Miss Kramisha Make-Them-Do-My-Bidding are sound asleep.”

  Stevie Rae grabbed a Mountain Dew and joined them at the table, sitting heavily and yawning. “Yeah, barely. It’s easier to stay awake during the day down here, but I gotta tell ya, I’m pretty dang tired. Stark’s asleep already?”

  “Yeah.” Stevie Rae thought Z looked worried. “He’s been having problems sleeping since, well, you know—he came back from the Otherworld. So when he passes out I just let him alone.”

  “It’ll take a while, but he’ll be back to normal soon,” Stevie Rae said.

  “I hope so,” Zoey said and chewed at her lip.

  “Speaking of boyfriends, is yours a bird?” Aphrodite asked her.

  “Yes.” Stevie Rae gave her a narrowed-eye look. “And I don’t wanna talk about it.”

  “But we do need to know exactly why the Raven Mockers were at the school today,” Darius said, not unkindly, “And since Rephaim is unable to answer our questions we’re hoping you can.”

  “I thought this meeting was about the True Sight stuff,” Stevie Rae said, feeling immediately defensive of Rephaim.

  “It is, but it’s also a catch-up meeting,” Damien said. “I think we need one, don’t you?”

  There was just no way to argue with Damien, especially when he had that sweet, concerned look on his face. Stevie Rae met his eyes. “Yeah, I think we do. So, to start with, how are you holdin’ up?”

  Damien blinked several times, like he was surprised by the question, which made Stevie Rae feel like crap. Had everydangbody forgotten Damien had lost his boyfriend just days ago?

  “It was better being at school today. It felt like a step toward normal.” Damien spoke slowly and carefully, as if he had to think about each word. “But I missed Jack a lot. Actually, and I know this might sound crazy, but I kept expecting to see him around every corner in the hallway.”

  “That’s not crazy,” Zoey said. “I keep expecting to see Heath, too. It’s hard and just plain wrong when someone dies too soon.” Everyone watched the different expressions play across Z’s face, and then she added, “My mom, too. I know I’ve been at the House of Night since last year, and even before that she and I hadn’t been close for a while, but it’s hard to really get that she’s dead. So I understand what you mean about Jack.”

  “That makes it better, too,” Damien said. “The fact that you guys understand what it’s like to lose someone close to you.” He smiled at Stevie Rae. “So, my answer to your question is that I’m holding up as well as can be expected.”

  “Good. Next question, or actually back to the original question,” Aphrodite said. “What were the birdboys doing at the House of Night?”

  “Kalona sent ’em. They were supposed to tell Rephaim that his daddy will take him back as soon as he admits he made a mistake choosing me and the Goddess.” Stevie Rae shook her head. “Sometimes I think Kalona’s just plain dumb.”

  “What do you mean?” Z asked.

  “Heck, Rephaim hasn’t even been my official boyfriend for a month. You’d think his daddy’d at least give us a chance to have our first fight before he was all ‘oooh, you’ve made a mistake.’”

  “What exactly was Rephaim’s response?” Darius asked.

  “Well, what do you think it was? Jeeze Louise, he’s still here.” Stevie Rae felt her anger build. “He told them to tell Kalona that he hadn’t made a mistake and he wasn’t comin’ back. Period. The end.”

  “Yeah, but is it?” Aphrodite said.

  “Is it what?” she asked.

  “Is it the end? Isn’t Kalona going to keep hanging around, trying to get Rephaim to see the light or whatever?”

  “So what if he does? Rephaim isn’t on his team anymore. He hasn’t been for a long time.”

  “So you say.”

  “So he says!” Stevie Rae felt like she was going to explode. “So his dad says. So his brothers say. So even Nyx says! The dang Goddess herself showed up and forgave him. What the hell does Rephaim have to do to prove to you guys he’s changed?”

  “Hey, no one’s saying Rephaim has to prove anything,” Zoey said, sending Aphrodite a you’re not helping look. “But we do need to know if something is up with Kalona and the Raven Mockers.”

  “Z, nothin’s up with them. Well, except that it really hurt Rephaim that that dang bull kid killed one of ’em. Seriously, guys, his brothers weren’t doin’ anything except talkin’ to him. Dragon showed up, pissed of course, but we all get that because of Anastasia. Still, the Raven Mockers were just defendin’ themselves. Aurox is the one we should be askin’ questions about.”

  “Yeah, except that we don’t have Aurox answers here—and we should have Rephaim answers,” Aphrodite said.

  “I gave you his answers.” Even as weak and tired as she felt because it was past sunrise, Stevie Rae automatically began pulling power from the earth. Not that she’d really hurt Aphrodite, but the girl definitely needed a good smack.

  “Hey, you’re glowing green,” Z said.

  “Well, I’m pissed!” Stevie Rae saw Darius move closer to Aphrodite, which really annoyed her. “You know what, Darius, you need to check yourself. We’re all on the same side here, but that doesn’t mean we can’t get pissed at each other once in a while.”

  “I think we can all understand that. Isn’t that right, Darius?” Damien said in his calmest, most soothing voice.

  “Yes, of course,” Darius said.

  Aphrodite snorted.

  “So, basically, Rephaim said no to Kalona and the Raven Mockers were just the messengers,” Z said. “Right?”

  “Totally right,” Stevie Rae said.

  “Okay, let’s move on to True Sight.” Zoey looked at Damien. “Want to summarize what you’ve found out?”

  “Yeah, but it’s not much. There’s only a short reference to it in the advanced handbook. Basically, it’s rare and it hasn’t happened for a long time. Like as in more than a couple hundred years. It’s frustrating because there isn’t a lot of documentation about it, but from what I could find it seems that a fledgling or vampyre gifted with True Sight—and they’re usually vampyres, by the way—has the ability to see the truth about people.”

  “That’s a handy little gift,” Aphrodite said.

  “You’d think so, but the problem is that the ‘seeing’ is only as accurate as the person with the gift,” Damien said.

  “Huh?” Zoey said.

  “Okay, it’s like this: Shaylin has to be good at using her gift. She has to understand what she’s seeing and interpret it accurately,” Damien said.

  “And if she doesn’t, it’s just a bunch of colors?” Zoey said.

  “Worse,” Damien said. “Because with True Sight it’s never just a bunch of colors. We all know she’s seeing inside someone’s soul.” He shook his head. “In the handbook there were excerpts of stories about how True Sight has been misunderstood and misused. It can be bad, really bad.”

  “How about guidelines or rules or whatnot?” Z asked.

  “None. It’s different for everyone who has the Sight,” Damien said.

  “So we’re just shootin’ in the dark,” Stevie Rae said, feeling totally overwhelmed. “Again.”

  “I think that depends entirely on what kind of
person Shaylin is,” Damien said.

  “She’s buddied up to Erik, which isn’t a great sign,” Aphrodite said.

  “Hey, some of us who used to be buddied up with Erik have turned out okay,” Zoey said. “And plus, a girl who can see his true colors could be really good for him.”

  Aphrodite snorted. “If she can actually translate them correctly—or whatever you want to call it.”

  “I want to believe that she can,” Damien said.

  “Yeah, me too,” Stevie Rae said, but who she was really thinking about was Rephaim and Kalona. Please, Nyx, let Rephaim be able to see the truth. As she sent up the fervent but silent prayer, her eyes lifted and she met her BFF’s gaze.

  “I want to believe, too,” Zoey said softly as if she could read Stevie Rae’s mind.

  “Well, I want to believe that when I step out of this room and down the hall I’m going to be instantly transported to a suite at the Ritz-Carlton on Grand Cayman Island. I understand the rest of you are sun challenged, but I could use a little shake and bake.” Aphrodite paused and gave Darius a sexy grin. “I’ll take care of the baking part if you can handle the shaking.”

  Stevie Rae stood up and yawned. “Okay, before y’all get totally gross I’m gonna go pass out. I’ll see everybody at dusk.”

  “Ugh, school and no Ritz. Double ugh, reality,” Aphrodite said. “Goddess, I’m glad tomorrow is Friday.” She raised a blond brow at Zoey. “I can promise you I’m doing some serious shop and redecorate this weekend. Battling evil, Darkness, or whatever is just gonna have to wait.”

  “Hey, speaking of rooms, does anyone know where Erik put Shaylin?” Stevie Rae asked around another huge yawn.

  “Elizabeth No Last Name’s room,” Damien said.

  “Kinda creepy,” Stevie Rae said.

  “It’s not like she’s using it,” Aphrodite said.